Four Seconds: Not Enough To Break Desna Jackson's Spirit

(Editor's note:  We applaud Desna's willingness to share not only her race experience (below), but also her commitment, perseverance, warm spirit and personable self to us all.  Our mail bag is always open for your race reports.  We'd love to share it here.  ~ NV)

Michael Jordan once said, "It takes only one point to win a game."

Nevertheless, I have always said that must be the greatest loss felt by the losing team -- to have victory within your reach then just have it snatched from under you.

The questions.

The "What if?"

The finger pointing.

Then, there is your SPIRIT and the repetitive self questioning of "How do I bounce back from this?!"

Last year when I ran the Chevron Houston Marathon, I started cramping at mile nine.  Still, I finished five minutes ahead of the designated time.  (5:55:19 was Desna's official time. ~ NV)

At the time I thought, "It can't get worse than that."  Boy, was I wrong!

This year I went in at a disadvantage because I had plantar fasciitis. (Yes, Desna and Galen Rupp.)  

However, with the remedies and inserts in my shoe, I was not worried.

Even though the weather was not going to be as desirable as I had wanted, I still was not worried.

I had put in all the work during training and followed the plan Coach Rich (Cooper) set up.  I ate well, hydrated properly and most importantly I got all the rest I needed to do well.

I was more confident in my training than I was in all the adversity that was before me.

Pictured before the race with Coach Rich Cooper, Desna's smile is never, ever cramped.
(Photo courtesy of Bill Dwyer)

So, race day, I started cramping at mile four.

After two stops at the Medical tents, I practically had to walk the whole thing.

At about mile 17 or 18, the pain was so excruciating that I considered stopping.

However, I gave myself a mental talk, prayed and decided that even if I were the last person, I was going to cross that finish line.

And I did ... in 6:00:04!

Then came the hard part:  a DQ because I didn't finish in the allotted time frame.  Crushed!

That quote from Michael Jordan kept playing over and over in my head.

"Four seconds!"

Maybe if I had not made that second stop at the Medical tent.
Maybe if I had just stepped a little faster at the end.
Maybe that last water stop was not necessary.
Maybe this emotional pain would not be so hard-felt if I had only quit at mile 18.

Maybe, maybe, maybe ... just maybe.

So now, I am left to deal with the curse of the 26.2 because I have already learned that it CAN get worse, BUT it was Michael Jordan who also said, "I can accept failure, everyone fails at something. But I can't accept not trying."

With the curse of 26.2 looming over my head, in my best Arnold Schwarzenegger's voice, "I will be back at Chevron next year!  After all, I have a year to heal emotionally!"